mga lecheng pang-asar

1. On the first day of the Mango sale, the sister of my friend was looking around and picked up a dress when a woman at the counter started screaming,"Put that down, that's mine!" The sister of my friend looked up, looked at the woman up and down, raised an eyebrow, and replied, "Excuse me. You are NOT small'"

2. A supervisor once told a worker who has difficulty in understanding instructions, "Ang ulo, hindi lang yan pinapatong sa leeg, ginagamit din yan sa pagiisip."

3. A friend told another friend, "Naku, magme-makeup muna ako, baka magmukha akong yaya mo." The other friend replied, "Wag na, magmumukha ka lang yaya ko na naka-makeup."

4. I told my then boyfriend during a fight, "Even on your smartest day, you're not half as smart as I am on my dumbest!"

5. "Ako, I was born beautiful. Ikaw, you were just born."

6. A letter posted on a car windshield in UP: "Sir/madam, the parking space that we have reserved is for the College Secretary, not for you. Guard."

7. When I saw a friend I haven't seen in a long time, she told me, "Grabe, lalo ka pang tumaba!" So I told her, "Ikaw din, lalo ka pang pumangit!"

8. Pag sinisingitan ako sa pila, nagpaparinig ako. I say, "Ang pilang ito, according to beauty. Mga panget muna."

9. From the movie She's The Man: "Girls with an ass like mine don't go out with boys with a face like yours."

10. "Maliban sa mukha mo, ano pang problema mo?"

11. I once told an officemate who kept on bragging about
her new shoes, " Sale , right?"

12. I pointed a "7 items or less" sign to a clueless pasosyal at the supermarket. She bitchily answered, "I can read!" Sabay irap. So I shot back with, "I know, but can you count?"

13. "Tuwing nakikita kita, gusto ko mag-sorry sa eyes ko."

14. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be bitchy.
It's an involuntary reaction whenever I encounter ugly people."

15. Man: "Hey baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not enter."

16. Man: "how do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized."

17. After receiving her payslip and realizing how much she's paying for tax, a sosyal officemate exclaimed, "Ang mga poor ba nagbabayad din ng tax?"

18. During a hike at Mt. Mayon , we had a maarte companion.
When we ran out of water, our guide got us some from a natural spring. The maarte girl said, "Dini-drink ba yan?" I told her, "Bakit, sa inyo ba ang water chinu-chew?"

19. Overheard from 2 kids talking.
Kid 1: "Lahat tayo galing kay Adam and Eve."
Kid 2: "Hindi yan totoo. Sabi ng papa ko, galing tayo sa unggoy."
Kid 1: "Hindi natin pinag-uusapn ang pamilya mo, kaya
wag kang magulo!"

20. A friend told his officemate: "I'm impressed. I've never encountered such a small mind inside such a big head before."

21. Bading: (envying a girl na crush ng crush nya) "Isang butas lang ang lamang mo sa kin!"

22. I was staring at an ugly bystander in their street. The ugly guy snapped, "Bakit ang sama mo makatingin?" I snapped back, "Eh bakit ang sama mo tignan?"

23. A friend once told me, "Ang ganda mo!" I answered: "Thank you, sana ikaw rin."

24. I told this to an ex: "I must admit you brought
religion to my life. I never believed in hell till I met you."

25. "When a cashier tells me she doesn't have change, I say: "And... kaninong problema yun?"

26. "Kung lahat ng tao galing sa unggoy, bakit ikaw, mukha kang kabayo?

27. When a catty friend asked me, "ba't single ka pa?
Sabi ko. "Owenongayon?! Pakelam mo? Basta maganda ko! Pakelaman mo yang muka mo! Pa-Belo mo nga yan! Kung di mo afford, magtakip ka na lang ng belo. Bwahahahahahahah!!!!!"

28. Advice given to a “NBSB” (no BF since birth) friend who has set very high standards in finding a boyfriend; “Wag ka na masyado pumili ng pogi, hindi ka naman kagandahan.”

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Season 2 Castaways Search is ON!

the audition dates are revealed! again, SM Malls are in part of the search for the next ultimate survivor and other 17 castaways that will be thrown to an unknown location.

March 3 - 4 Baguio City

March 9 - 10 Naga City

March 27 - 28 SM North EDSA

March 29 - 30 SM Mall of Asia

season 1 castaways are rumored to be part of the screening judges.

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Total Relaxation (Spa and Movies: WHY NOT diba?)

with a lot of you've been doing, how can you still manage to go take a rest? people would say, RELAX, SEE A MOVIE. but isn't it also stressful going to the movie houses and you won't even be able to watch the movie as you wanted because of noises in the room? like when i watch Harry Potter and kids are making a lot of noises and keep asking their guardians why is it and why is that? i would say to myself, just watch the movie, you brats! now tell me, did i get a relaxing moment? no. and with all the work at the office, even while just sitting down is hard on the back. sometimes you get your eyes tired and your shoulders get pains. some stretches won't do if you got tons of load. in those times, i just wish that someone could give me a back rub or a little massage when i want to get the pain off.

but i want to get both perks at the same time. movies and back rubs combined! you think that's impossible? no, it exists! really! how? this is the new buzz. i came across this blog (http://techfilipino.com) about the new BlueWater Day Spa located in Ortigas and found out that they have developed a Spa Theater! a theater in a spa may have been off the track but the owners of this spa have made it possible for us. imagine, you are getting your muscles relaxed and your eyes satisfied with your favorite movie!

BlueWater Day Spa's Spa Theater has a 28-people capacity so you can have 27 of your friends and loved ones in one great party. i would like to have a game on this, i would ask 27 people who say they are "virgins" to touches, massage touch if i should specify on that. the ones with the funny bones or the komikeros and komikeras and we'll see who won't stand on a stroke on the foot, a little pressure within the waist area. hahaha i don't know if there's still people like that who are malakas ang kiliti. and then the funniest movie will be shown here:

what do you think? it's nice, right? but wouldn't you think that it's nice to have a movie party if you have Dolby Surround Sound 7.1 reception, a projection of about 160 inch-5 feet wide, while sitting on a Lazy Boy couch. whoa! ang sarap!

back on the game, everyone should give in to the pot money and stay focused and relaxed without laughing at a massage pressure. at mahahawa na ang lahat once may isang taong kakaiba ang hagikgik. the winner gets the pot money! of course, everybody will benefit from it too. katuwaan lang na walang tatawa sa masahe. (i think i'll lose this game in the middle. hehe)

what if, a date auction! hahaha.. never been to those kinds of events but i think it's fun. and then the bids will be used for charity para may good cause. a bundle of searchees will be paraded and the searcher with the highest bid will get the seachee for a date. sa private room pa ng spa. hahaha... may pumatol kaya sa gimik na to?

oh well, in case you want to know more about this new spa that people have been buzzing about, check out their website. and hope your imagination will overflow with ideas on how to spend your quality time there.

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dahil ako daw ay "the most popular blogger"

naku ang dami nang event invites sakin. ewan ko kung san nila nakukuha email ko! well yung iba nga naman e nakikita ko sa mga blogs at sa plurk na sine-share ng mga ka-plurk ko. maraming balita sa plurk lalo na pagin-add nyo ako. malapit na at mararating ko na din ang nirvana at madadagdagan na ang emoticons ko. haha...

dna ako magbblog tungkol sa balentongs day dahil marami na rin dyang nagpost about it. saka ano naman ipopost ko diba? pero palapit na ang summer. hubaran at basaan na naman! kaliwa't kanang events ang nakikita ko e dko naman mapuntahan. so punta na lang ako sa pinakamalapit at libre.

first stop, Island Cove, Cavite. i got this invite from Ms. Kankan of Yehey.com that says this:

Congratulations! You are one of the chosen thirty who have been invited to trek an extraordinary quest to thrill and excitement!

Prepare your adventure bags and get ready to drift away from the hustlin' and bustlin' streets of the metro as we take you to a different route to the hottest, summer-splashing journey of the year.

Island Cove and Yehey.com summons you for a whole-day sun-soaked expedition to DETOUR: the Island Cove Adventure on Thursday, March 5, 2009.

Race against time as this one of a kind island voyage tests your feat and feet! Brace yourselves together with a lot of your adventure maneuvers and strategies as numerous Island Cove recreation offerings and diversion destinations await you in this sportacular day! Thank you!

shempre, go naman ako! dpa ako nakakapunta dito and this time, libre pa! sorry guys, invite lang e. ;)

next, the e-Lib.blog event. di naman ako from UP but this event came from a UP ITTC event organizer:

We are inviting you and your date to [e-Lib.blog] (date daw 'o!)

A half-day blogging event on the latest from the Philippine e-Library Portal.

Mr. Chito Angeles will give us updates and tell us more about how the project will benefit its users. You might also get a chance to be hired as the official Philippine e-Library blogger and get paid for every post made about the e-Lib project.

To ensure seat reservation, visit http://elibraryblog.eventbrite.com/ password: ilovetoblog Register Now.

The event is by invitation only until February 11. You are one of the lucky bloggers to have been invited to this exclusive event.

See you on the 14^th of February, 1:00 PM, at the Lecture Hall of the Department of Computer Science in UP Diliman, Quezon City.

This is moved to March 14 so you can still register for the event. sabi pa nga sa reminder to bring own laptops. OMG wala ako nun kaya eto na ang personal mantra ko: ohmski-hanap-pero-bili-laptop. hays bahala na.

tapos Caramoan naman! yipee! balik-Bicol ako after 19 years! at malamang marami na nagbago dun. meron na nga daw SM Naga. dapat mapuntahan ko un pagbalik ko!

niwei, thanks to the organizers for inviting me to these events. more events to come at sana pati movie screenings at lalo na food events -- marami ang nag-aabang ng event sa TasteAsia. hahaha...

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Ohmski's Blogline: now I understand what INDIE means

i came from Beverly Hills where stories are being told.

a very worthwhile experience for movie enthusiasts lalo na sa mga storytellers ang event na naganap nung sabado sa Marilou Diaz-Abaya Film Institute. storytellers because of the stories that everyone wants to share, to give ideologies, to appreciate. and that's what Mainstream Loves Indie's mission is. we were joined by exceptional filmmakers like of course, Marilou Diaz-Abaya (Jose Rizal, Muro-Ami), Laurice Guillen (Tanging Yaman), Mark Meily (Crying Ladies, Baler), wife Lee Meily (cinematographer), Tony Gloria (producer and Sharon Cuneta's discoverer), Sari Dalena (Rigodon), Tara Illenberger (Brutus) and Jim Libiran (Tribu).

so what is indie by the way? it is not our misconception that indie are just made by small time filmmakers. it's not. these big names said that making indies is in the manner of how you make it. kung halimbawa you are having a hard time with the resources at abunado ka pa sa mga props, etc., ganun ang indie. even Crying Ladies is an indie kahit nakapasok sya sa mga big film festivals at lalo na sa MMFF. there's a lot of obstacles for indie films alam nyo ba? especially with the distribution of the films they make. i also found out that most these people started sa advertising industry. so may relasyon pala ung post ko dito.

the whole experience was fun! shempre marami naman ako natutunan dun. and the institute was very welcoming and you will feel very at home. may i add, the dojo of the school is open for Art's sake. babayaran mo lang e P500 for each aircon electricity consumption. big deal dba? and i feel very at home. a filmshowing of some shorts from the students and concerts. masaya!

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A Moment will change our lives

yehey! a sequel on the hit movie: A Very Special Love. aminin ko nang kinilig talaga ako sa unang movie nila and now i can't wait to see this one. MTV pa lang e i can see big cash flow on the first screening. sana meron din akong premier night tickets. sa mga kapamilya movie bloggers dyan, PENGE TICKETS! d ko masyado naintindihan yung interview kahapon s The Buzz kasi hindi rin naman ako masyado nanonood na nun at nasa bahay ako ng mga tita ko while i'm busy blogging about being a shopaholic. but anyway, here's the music video of Sarah. she's very pretty at kahit pa-cowgirl ang manner e still kaya ka nyang pakiligin:



napansin ko lang, parang Rated K yung video. kung ano ung lyrics na kakantahin ni Sarah, lalabas ung words sa tabi. hahaha.. but anyway, that's just a comment. pwede naman mag-comment diba? pero still, i will wait to see this on February 25 or even at the premier night. parinig na ito sa mga may ticket. at least, kahit INVITE lang! hahaha

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My Shopaholic Confession

hi i'm ohmski, and i'm a shopaholic.

i have this very impulsive instinct when it comes to shopping. usually when i get bored and i found that i have money in my wallet, i buy all stuff that i want. lately when i had received my christmas bonus, immediately i bought some shirts, shorts and my basic needs for my own pampering. of course, i needed to reserve some for stuff at home and this leads me to the shopping mecca of the philippines, divisoria!

usually every christmas season, me and my mom are going to divisoria and all is on me. we start by dropping off at reyne rejente's meisic mall and from there, i can already get best buys. then a little walk at 168 to divisoria mall even at the tutuban center. even while on the road i can stretch my money and getting the best items on sale. 

i love getting bargains and wholesale items as gifts for my godchildren and relatives. i still end up buying more stuff for me. no need to ask, it's my own money! but i still manage to get all nice stuffs for everyone on the list. i want to be like a Santa on christmas. but i consider factors for the items to give to my love ones. the quality is still number one. that's why i'm having my mom to shop with me because she can be my advisor if an item is good.

but still i end up tired going home because i have bags of clothes and gift items on both hands. even though my feet hurts, i still have another day and another day to sweep the next shopping destination... the mall.

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